I can't even.

I can't even begin to fathom the immense faithfulness of God. From the time I was born twenty two years ago to the moment that I sit here writing 22 years later I can proclaim that God has been with me every step of the way. He has placed me in a vietnamese family on purpose to demonstrate His grace upon my life. I see blueprints of plans and detours along the way but the whole time that I see that, I know that God is always by my side holding me in His merciful hands. Through my disobedience, pride, short comings, failures, mishaps, denials and brokenness, God has mended my heart to serve His Kingdom. He has given me undeserving blessings, gifts, abilities because He trusts me.
I am sitting here just thinking how hard it was for me to trust and put my faith into people because I never really thought that I needed help. Because of this, I never really had friends to talk to about my issues because I would always bottled them up. I am thankful that God has saved me from my own pride and gifted me with the need of a Savior.
He has knitted my life out perfectly. The way that He desires it to be is coming true right in front of my eyes. Through the events in my life, I can stand confirming to you that God has chosen me and has purpose for me. He never promised that it would be easy but He did promise that He would never leave. What's more reassuring than having the Creator of the Universe being by your side at all times?


Ephesians 5 
5 lhe predestined us1 for madoption as sons through Jesus Christ, naccording to the purpose of his will, 6 oto the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in pthe Beloved. 7 qIn him we have rredemptionsthrough his blood, tthe forgiveness of our trespasses, uaccording to the riches of his grace, 8 which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight 9 vmaking known2 to us the mystery of his will, naccording to his purpose, which he wset forth in Christ 10 as a plan for xthe fullness of time, yto unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.


Finding your calling by yourself is hard, letting it go to God is a completely different picture. 
Will you take the chance? Are you ready for speed bumps and detours along the way? Are you willing to sacrifice?


ARE YOU WILLING TO LET GO? 


I am telling you right now that it is worth every ounce of your time, resources and energy because of this: 

I am made whole in Christ. 

His Purpose gives me fullness of Joy. 

revelation

Like a child, I tend to pout over things that I absolutely despite doing like making my bed, chores etc. My mom can testify to that! I am stubborn and if I don't like doing something your way, i'll resort to my way. I am out of control, disobedient and unleashed. Oh, did I  mention that I like to be in control of my life? I like to plan things and never follow through with them. Yup, that's me.

 But because of the love of my Savior Jesus dying on the cross for me, I can honestly say that I have a purpose in this broken world. I have purpose to live for a greater reason than I ever thought. HE has given me life, a fullness of joy and an abundant amount of love. I am beyond thankful that God has created me and has given me to serve His people. I didn't even realize how passionate I would be for teaching ESL to immigrants. Who would have known?
Oh, that's right.. God. My Heavenly Creator, Father, Majestic almighty, steadfast Lover God.
He knows my heart better than anybody and for that I can sit here proclaiming my contentment to my Lord and Savior.

Waiting for Him is a huge testimony to how real, how awesome He is.

I come writing this to you with a full heart filled with thankfulness.

The Steadfast Love of the Lord

33 hShout for joy in the Lord, O you righteous!

iPraise befits the upright.

2 Give thanks to the Lord with the jlyre;

make melody to him with jthe harp of kten strings!

3 Sing to him la new song;

play skillfully on the strings, with loud shouts.

4 For the word of the Lord is upright,

and all his work is done in mfaithfulness.

5 He nloves righteousness and justice;

othe earth is full of the steadfast love of the Lord.

6 By pthe word of the Lord the heavens were made,

and by qthe breath of his mouth all rtheir host.

7 He gathers the waters of the sea as sa heap;

he tputs the deeps in storehouses.

8 Let all the earth fear the Lord;

let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of him!

9 For uhe spoke, and it came to be;

he commanded, and it stood firm.

10 The Lord vbrings the counsel of the nations to nothing;

he frustrates the plans of the peoples.

11 wThe counsel of the Lord stands forever,

the plans of his heart to all generations.

12 xBlessed is the nation whose God is the Lord,

the people whom he has ychosen as his heritage!

13 The Lord zlooks down from heaven;

he sees all the children of man;

14 from awhere he sits enthroned he blooks out

on all the inhabitants of the earth,

15 he who fashions the hearts of them all

and observes all their deeds.

16 cThe king is not saved by his great army;

a warrior is not delivered by his great strength.

17 dThe war horse is a false hope for salvation,

and by its great might it cannot rescue.

18 Behold, ethe eye of the Lord is on those who fear him,

fon those who hope in his steadfast love,

19 that he may gdeliver their soul from death

and keep them alive in hfamine.

20 Our soul iwaits for the Lord;

he is our jhelp and kour shield.

21 For our heart is lglad in him,

because we mtrust in his holy name.

22 Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us,

even as we hope in you.

My precious friend Karakatu. 

bending down.

I just got back from a mission trip orientation.

This is the beginning of my journey to New York. As excited as I am, the Lord revealed many fears and anxieties that I had. But, I am in complete awe of God's grace and how He IS transforming me right now. He is breaking down my walls and stripping away my identity and personal desires for HIS. 

As I dig and read more of Jesus and His ministry, I can conclude that He scooped down to our level. 

1) He came down to us. A Holy, Righteous savior lived in this dirty, filthy world just like the rest of us. 

2) He healed. He rose. He loved. the poor, broken, unworthy. us. 

3) And most of all, He came just to make himself absolutely nothing to die on a cross for my sins and yours. 

4) He came to show us love but also to use us to show the rest of the world His Glory. 

I am realizing the depths and steps that it takes to serve the Almighty, Everlasting, Holy God. 

And you know what that is? 

As Katie Davis would say it.. bend down low. 

In other words, sacrifice. 
What do you need to sacrifice? 

To condense the list, I need to sacrifice who I am. 

I need live sacrificially. 

All for the sake of His Kingdom. 

Oh Lord, I need Your Spirit. Guide me and lead me and use me. 

closer to your heart

As I am drawing closer to Your heart, I am getting closer to finding contentment with who You have made me to be. 


I am beyond blessed to have a God who never gives up even when I want to have nothing to do with Him, when I fall short, when I fail.. He stands with arms wide open just waiting. 


This week, I have been going through 1 Peter. There is a reason that the Lord has pointed me to that scripture. He showed me characteristics of Himself through Peter's writing. As I am preparing to leave for New York for two weeks, God has been showing several things. 


1) When people question your faith, they are seeing the hope in you. Be prepared to do it in gentleness and respect. 


2) We can only have a good conscience from Jesus through the cross and His resurrection. 


3) I need to work on being more hospitable. 


4) If you are insulted for the name of Christ, You are blessed. His Spirit rests upon you. 


5) What you do and how you live are vital to the workings of the Kingdom. 


6) We will never fully understand who God is but we can grow closer to Him through Worship. 


Serve Him diligently and remember that He lives in you. 

looking ahead.

It's so amazing how time flies. This semester is almost over and that means I have one more semester left of college before I graduate with my first bachelors degree. I am so thankful for the time that God had me in Denton because I feel at home when I'm there. But, I have been praying and I think that God has called me to something bigger, out of my comfort zone and totally with kids. I LOVE working with kids. Who knew? 

Everybody around me has been asking me what my plans are for after graduation and to be honest I have no clue. Well, I have some clues that the Lord has slowly revealed to me in which I'm really excited for. These plans range from a) applying for teach for america, b) moving to Chicago to work with a church/with kids c) subbing d) find some sort of ministry internship to work with. Those are the plans right now. Do I think I'm going back to go to school at some point? God has laid that one my heart but I'm not quite sure what I would be studying. 

Lord, 

Thank you for changing my heart and opening my eyes to the needs of children. Thank you for using me and changing my perspective. You are awesome, faithful and everlasting. I trust you with all of my heart soul and mind. I am honored to be used by you. I am unworthy of your love. Thank you for your mercies and blessings. 

voices

Ray LaMontagne has the most beautiful voice.

You are the best thing may be my favorite song. 

What a fun song. 

Can't wait to dance to this song with hubs. 

One day : )